X-AMOUNT OF DOLLARS LATER, CITY FINALLY SETTLES ON NEW SLOGAN… AND OF COURSE IT SUCKS

The City of Columbia has finally decided on a new slogan and unfortunately none of our suggestions made the cut. With absolutely no fanfare, officials dumped the phrase “Famously Hot” on residents Tuesday through a surreptitious promotional video on YouTube (boringly placed above).

The phrases will be used in a series of ads in trade journals aimed at meeting and convention planners as soon as September.

“What attracts (planners) might not necessarily attract local people,” said Bob Livingston, one of two Lexington County members on the nine-member board. “But I think this is going to be great for the Midlands of South Carolina.” [JEFF WILKINSON - The State]

I’m not sure what the hell “Famously Hot” means other than, in the words of Billy Madison, I guess we’re “So hot… want to touch the hiney.” Too bad it’s about 70 and rainy in Columbia right now.

Conveniently, the city has also not yet released a final price tag for this trite, uninspiring new tagline. The last slogan, “Where Friendliness Flows,” cost taxpayers $70,000 just four years ago and officials estimated the new idea would be equally expensive.

In an effort to cut costs, we proposed a few great ideas at one-seventh the cost. Yet they ignored potential gold mines like “Where Taxpayer Money Comes To Die,” and “The Gateway to Calhoun County,” and “Just Like the South American Country, Only Not Spelled the Same.” TPS readers even chimed in with “Where we change police chiefs as often as our slogans,” and “Smiling faces, horrible drivers,” and dozens of other suggestions.